How Does HillyBilly Mom Do IT? August 29, 2007
Posted by Dale in : Blog Roll, Cars , CommentsIT being: publishing a post EVERY day, I sure as heck can’t do it. And thinking of things to write is difficult when you’re working 12 hour days.
But here goes today’s attempt…
Clarkson was right. People with cars with "flappy paddle" gearboxes have FLAPPY PADDLE heads.
I drove one such car yesterday.
The Mini Cooper Cabrio.
Cabrio is a ten dollar word for a "soft-top convertible".
Not, Pauline, a convertible in the Transformers sense, but rather that the roof folds down.
That is, if you can work out HOW to get the roof down. Took me and a helper 30 minutes to work it out. YES we read the supplied manual. You would think that a German car company would be able to get the owners manual understandable.
But NO. We had to ring the Mini dealer.
"Ah, soooo the parcel shelf in the boot (trunk for you North Americans) HAS TO BE IN PLACE" nothing in the owners manual about THAT.
Gear box, as you might guess, was one of those flappy paddle jobbies.
Hint here: READ the owner manual first.
The automatic gearbox has three modes:
- DRIVE
- works like a normal automatic transmission
- is CRAP - SPORT DRIVE
- works like a normal automatic transmission EXCEPT the car is a heck more responsive. Heck, in DRIVE, it felt like I was driving a lumpy cammed race car.
Or a two-stroke motorcycle. All or nothing performance. - STEPTRONIC mode aka Flappy Paddle mode.
What are flappy paddles? They are the levers on the steering wheel which allow you to change gears up or down. I couldn’t work it out in a whole days worth of driving.
The STEPTRONIC mode is a bit of a smart arse in that it won’t let you hold the car just below the red line, it will change up for you. I used the gearshift instead.
Using the manual gearshift made a medium difference. If I had the car for a week, I’d get used to it.
Handling was good and predictable. Predictable in a good way. The car would telegraph that, "Oi! I’m getting ready to slide out SO STOP BEING SILLY"
The significant other said "Is that squealing the tires on the corners?"
‘I know nothing dearest’, said me with a huge smile.
Performance, if you found the right gear, it was "pushed back in the seat" stuff. Oh I’ve driven quicker and faster cars, but the acceleration was fun.
Braking was excellent and you didn’t feel like you were squished against the seat belt to achieve.
Speed? Well I saw 150kph when passing someone …
The downsides?
No boot (trunk) space. 4 cartons of beer would be the carrying limit. Not allowed to drink drive these days, so that makes the boot useless.
If your children were pigmies, the Mini’s rear seats are ideal.
No vision out the back. In the words of Clarkson
"… but driving the Mini is like driving with a box on your head. For parking you need to use the force. And when pulling out of oblique junctions, might I suggest you get rubbing those rosaries. …"
Summary
More fun than the Astra, less pure sportiness than the Mazda MX-5.
I’d buy one.
Postscript
After speaking with someone who owns a Cooper S Hardtop, the Mini falls into the "toy" category. The only downside they’re noticed is that the (optional) traction control activates too soon.